Sat 31st Dec 2005 – 6pm
Hi-ya Petrill, Nowrath, Krystel and Steef (Sorry...) Crisp (Downunder-NZ)
We hope you are having a marvellous start to your New Year with lots of one
eyed Nelson Winks and Hot Whale-Steaks with British Empire Imperial Sauce
dribbling down the fresh linen smelling vest of a buxom waitress in
hotpants with leaking nipples bringing in the new ‘Lambretta 2006’
clientel.
Big-tire Pizzas surround you with fringes on top and mountains of love with
bowls full of imitation carrot snow anointing your clean-on last year
encumbrences with good fettle, fennel, futtle, fartel and washed down with
courvoisier flannel.
“Do we miss you?
”Yes – like blind incontinent seagulls on a cold freezing caravan roof”
“Like a dentist’s drill when you’ve just made love to his aneathatist wife
and hygienist in the morning coffee-break.”
“Like the bad breath of a transvestite lottery winner who wants to embrace
your girth and share his fortune of a year’s supply of tuna protein-E rash
cream.”
“Like an engineer nut slipping with a knuckle-wrapping set of Taiwanese
spanners made out of camel soap while their hands are covered in the
foreman’s Macdonald’s red pepper sauce.”
“Like lumpy porridge mixed with bird seed and molasses rubbed into your
hair by a hairdresser who is torching his shop with petrol syphoned from
your new hedgetrimmer bought at an aborigini bootsale.”
Yes of course we miss you … You are always in the heart of our inbox and
never far from our spam list.
Have a super time – wish we were with you – we’re off to Berties soon.
New year’s resolution is - More of everything – Less of nothing – Giving
and doing more -Sowing wild mushrooms with an Ellandian princess with
porcelain skin.
Miss you more than Heather.
Geofferino & Trishkakaka xxxx (Upabove in UK)
PS - See you in Richmond Clive
